As we draw close to Thanksgiving in the USA, it’s a wonderful opportunity to take time to be grateful. 

When I am in gratitude, there is no doubt that it opens my heart and I feel a sense of fullness and peace in my body.

Getting to gratitude is not always easy, especially if you are feeling some upset in your life and you are in judgment about something. 

One of the practices I use to assist myself in moving out of judgment and into gratitude is the self forgiveness process. Those who work with me, will inevitably learn this powerful technique. 

This process was part of the curriculum at the University of Santa Monica in pursuit of my Master’s Degree; this process has served me personally and professionally for many years now.

One of the keys to this process is to forgive the judgment you hold. This process is not just about forgiving yourself or another person, but forgiving the actual judgment that you placed on the situation. My experience with this process has produced a deeper and clearer way of releasing judgments. I encourage you to try this, at the perfect time, during the time of Thanksgiving! Please let me know how this process works for you and what you uncover.


1. Think of something you are upset about. This could be a situation, person, or about yourself.

2. What is the judgment you hold? Some common judgments that I hear in my practice are: I don’t have the relationship I want because: I am not lovable, I am not good enough, I am not strong enough to ask for what I want, or I am not strong enough to attractive enough, etc.

3. Now, say this statement as you feel into your heart space. (I like to place my  hand on my heart to really feel it from my body so that it is included and I am not just saying it from my head). 

“I forgive myself for judging myself for / as…  unlovable, as unattractive, for not being able to ask for what I want, or feeling not wanted” etc.

4. As you continue this process, feel into what is happening in your body and how you feel as you release the judgments.

5. When you feel complete, you are likely to sense that something has released. You might feel lighter and more open. You might have the ability to see the situation from a new perspective. 

6. Now, ask yourself: “What is the real truth?” Declare your answer! “The truth is that I am lovable just the way I am.” “The truth is that I am able to ask for what I want.” etc. 

7. Then reflect: “what I am grateful for right now is….”

When you are in true gratefulness, you are able to feel it through your entire body. When I experience this, I often feel joyful and fulfilled, with a deep sense of satisfaction. It is a place of being connected, alive, and present. In this place, I am able to rest into myself and let go of the contraction in my being that judgment holds.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving! Wherever you are in the world, may you find something to be grateful for!

With love,

Share the Wisdom with Those you Love and Care About!